what shows up ....

Well, let's see what happens when I open up the blog to write and have no plan....

It's winter. It's cold - which is relative, because I suppose if we lived in Canada this might feel springish, but to me, it's cold. It snowed last night and this morning, and my only venture out was to the back porch to bring in sticks of firewood throughout the day. My husband works in the weather...120 degrees, or 20 degrees -- he's out in it - and he doesn't complain. When I'm 'miserable' because of the weather, I think about what he does...and I'm not sure how he does it ... but I know why.

I've been thinking about that a lot lately -- why people do what they do. Like - make choices to go into a certain field of study - then complain about the work load, the length of time it takes to finish, and the teachers. Choose a career, or do whatever it takes to get a specific job -- then gripe about the hours, the pay, the demands. Wait and date -- looking for the perfect mate -- then get disgusted, nag, cheat, and eventually leave to start the whole process over again. Have children -- then complain about every phase of their lives. What are we looking for? Perfection? Where is that? Why are we so selfish? We want what we want, when we want it, how we want it...and when we're tired of it, we want it gone. Gee...what babies we are!

I have been in that 'whiny baby' frame of mind a 'few' times. I am blessed with so much; still there are times I find myself in the ungrateful and unsettled mode of wanting life all in place, planned out, smooth sailing .... everybody's dreams coming true and all of us happy -all the time. Like Burger King ... Fix it my way. I suppose if it could actually work like that there would either be nothing else to hope for -- or I'd find something else to hope for.

I used to direct the children's choir at our church and I remember this line from a song the kids sang: "Happiness depends on a happening. Joy depends on Jesus."

My husband is a 'joy' guy. He may be sweating or freezing, but he finds the joy in his work because he is proud of what he does and thankful for the job that provides for his family - which is where his heart is - even when he's hundreds of miles away. I'm glad God gives me enough happenings to be happy -- and I guess I'm even thankful that sometimes things don't go my way so the line from the song can remind me that happiness and joy are not the same.

jm